Don't Wanna Marry Me
by MaeTowle
Summary: Elijah has heard that the somehow still human Elena is getting married. He has returned to Mystic Falls filled with thoughts of what might have been... Loosely inspired by Thomas Rhett's "Marry Me."
1. Elijah

**AN: As should be obvious, I don't own TVD or any of the recognizable characters. If I did, Elejah would very much be a real thing. This is my first attempt at publishing fanfic, so I hope you enjoy. It was supposed to be some small, little fluffy piece, but the plot bunnies ran away with me, and there will be at least one more chapter. Thanks, and enjoy! ~Mae**

Here he was, standing in the back of a packed church, but he had no idea what he was doing there. This wasn't his place. He hadn't been back in this miserable town for nigh on a decade, and there was no happy reason to be here now. Certainly, the people pressing in on all sides held a different opinion, but as Elijah watched the never-ending stream of well-dressed humans pour in, he couldn't shake the idea that their joyous occasion was a funeral to him.

Some dream he had never truly allowed himself to dream was coming to an end today. And much as he had spent years telling himself that all he wanted was for her to be happy, safe, and _human_ , he knew, without a doubt, that it wasn't what he really wanted for her. He lifted the flask to his lips again, hoping that the burn of the whiskey would be enough to distract him from the thought that his long-dead heart was well and truly breaking.

A standing room only wedding. Of course, that's what Elena Gilbert would have. Not that that would be her name for much longer. No, Elena Anderson just didn't have the same ring to it. But she would have this many people to wish her well on the start of her new life. Her compassionate heart knew no limit, and people were drawn to that kind of goodness - damaged, damned, and broken Original vampires, included.

Speaking of, someone stepped close to him. "If you keep drinking at this rate, brother, you will have nothing left to get you through the ceremony."

"Niklaus," Elijah said. He didn't turn to look at his brother. He didn't want to know how he was being regarded at this moment. Niklaus had made it clear over the centuries that he found Elijah's obsession with the doppelgängers inconvenient at best, pathetic and weak at worst. However, Elijah wouldn't even be here today if it weren't for Niklaus.

* * *

" _Brother, I heard some interesting news from Caroline today," Niklaus said as Elijah strolled in from the Quarter. "It has to do with your favorite doppelgänger."_

" _I have no favorite doppelgänger, Niklaus, you know that."_

" _I know that you would like to believe that. But the fact that you still won't allow me to return to Miss Gilbert for more of her blood says otherwise."_

" _I merely believe you should focus on the disaster we have here in New Orleans, instead of riling up the inhabitants of Mystic Falls once more. But, I do not deny you the things you desire, Niklaus, another thing you well know."_

 _Klaus refrained from rolling his eyes. Ever since Hayley had married Jackson, his brother had become even more closed off than he could ever remember. And his news had a chance of making things even worse. But if Elijah could step up… Maybe there was a chance. Caroline seemed to think he friend wasn't as happy as she was pretending._

" _Do you want to hear my news, or not?"_

" _Your manner indicates that you're going to tell me whether I want you to or not, brother, so spare us both the pain of drawing it out. What is Caroline's news of Miss Gilbert?"_

" _Interesting that you phrase your question that way," Klaus said. "From what I hear, that will no longer be a proper way to refer to her in a few months."_

" _Please, just spit it out, Niklaus. I have other things I wish to be doing today."_

" _Ah, yes, I forget that pining and brooding are such time-consuming activities. Fine, since your day is clearly spoken for, I will 'spit it out.' Caroline has informed me that our Miss Gilbert is getting married."_

 _There was a moment of perfect, frozen silence. Elijah didn't move, and whatever reaction Klaus had been hoping for was nonexistent._

" _You must be thrilled, Niklaus," he said eventually, keeping his tone even and his face impassive. He couldn't remember it ever being quite this difficult. "It appears the doppelgänger line will have a chance to continue. And you can resume your hybrid army plan, even if, as you say, I never allow you near Miss Gilbert again."_

 _With this, he turned away and sped off to his room. And, even knowing that Klaus could hear him, once the door was closed, Elijah gave into the burning anger that boiled up in him. He flipped his desk, and that was the last thing he remembered until he stood in a room filled with rubble. None of his furniture had escaped unscathed, and he idly watched as his knuckles knit themselves back together._

* * *

"He's right, Elijah," Rebekah said as she stepped up to stand on her brother's other side. "You need to pace yourself. Especially since we will cease to believe that you're okay if you continue to act like a drunk at something as joyous as a wedding of someone who, honestly, has gone against all the odds to even be alive now. I thought for sure Elena would never make it this long. She's officially the oldest of any of the doppelgängers."

"Rebekah," Elijah said through gritted teeth.

"It's even more remarkable when one considers how much you wanted to kill the girl, sister," Klaus said.

"Or the fact that you actually _did_ kill her, Nik," Rebekah fired back.

"It didn't stick," he said with a shrug.

"Would you two please shut up," Elijah ground out.

"Oh, are we distracting you from your silent wish to kill everyone in the room," Klaus asked, "simply for daring to be happy for Elena."

"Don't say her name," Elijah said. "You have no right to say her name. She was only ever a pawn to you."

"Ah, no. She was an ingredient. She was an adversary, and a surprisingly tough one. And then, she was… something else."

"You're the one who used her as bait, Elijah," Rebekah said, carefully trying to remind him that none of them had been good for the star of the day's events. "And I, as Nik said, wanted her dead for so long."

"Yes, and now, you're helping her walk down the aisle," Elijah said, finally turning to look at his little sister. His face was as blank as it ever was, but she knew her brother. And the pain and fire in his eyes put Nik, at his worst, to shame.

"I tried to tell you to go to her sooner," she mumbled. "I didn't want this for either one of you." She laid a hand on Elijah's cheek, but he pulled away as if she burned him.

"I am only here to ensure that…" Elijah faltered. He couldn't think of a reason to be here. Well, not one that he would admit to. He was here to see her. Just once more. Once she belonged to someone else, he was leaving, and he would never look back. And this time, New Orleans wouldn't be far enough away. He didn't know where he would go, but it had to be somewhere no one had ever heard of Elena Gilbert…

He knew she was right, Rebekah had tried to convince Elijah to return to Mystic Falls. But, like he had told her once, she didn't have any smart brothers. He was an idiot.

* * *

"' _Lijah?" Rebekah stood in the doorway, taking in the rubble that lay in the wake of Elijah releasing his temper. This was the third time she'd found his bedroom destroyed._

 _Elijah looked up and straightened his suit coat. Somehow, he never managed to ruin his suit, even as he ruined everything around him. But that wasn't what worried her. What concerned Rebekah was the blankness in her brother's eyes._

 _Though he had always looked unreadable to everyone else, she knew there were a select few who could read what his face never said. And her brother was hurting. Badly. He had been wounded when Hayley had elected to marry Jackson leaving Elijah behind. But he had also understood. It was for family - for Hope - an inclination that was innate to him._

 _Furthermore, as much as he had cared for Hayley, Rebekah knew that the wolf-girl wasn't the one who truly held his heart. It wasn't his to give to anyone anymore, and she wasn't sure that even he knew it. But she did. She had known for years. And, shocking as it was, she was now friends with the object of his affections. And she knew that the girl was in denial just as much as Elijah._

" _Rebekah," Elijah said, glancing around at the mess as if he had no idea how it had gotten there. "It seems I have lost my temper again."_

" _Really, Elijah? And what gave that away?"_

 _He disregarded the question and carefully removed his jacket to begin cleaning up. She found it entertaining that he made sure to take it off to clean up after these outbursts, but it never seemed to occur to him to take it off before he flew off the handle. Well, maybe entertaining wasn't the right word._

 _Rebekah entered the room carefully. She was ready to try this again, though she was pretty sure that her earlier words were the reason that his furniture lay on the floor in pieces not even fit for kindling. But he needed to hear her. If he was this upset, he needed to try to do something about it before it was too late. She wasn't sure he would survive watching this one get married to someone else._

 _She watched him pile up the pieces of his desk._

" _You should go to her," she said._

" _And who would that be, Rebekah?" Elijah asked without looking up. "You'll need to be more specific, there are many 'her's in my life."_

" _I don't need to be more specific," she argued. "Where you're concerned, there could be a million 'her's, but your mind will always go to one before all the others."_

" _I know not what you're referring to."_

 _She sighed. "Elijah…"_

" _No. Rebekah. Don't."_

" _She's not happy."_

" _She's getting married. Of course she's happy. And as you know, that's what I wanted for her. And this is what Niklaus wants for her - the chance for the doppelgänger line to continue."_

" _This is_ not _what you want for her," Rebekah argued. "I know what you want for her, and it has nothing to do with a boring human who just manages to make her feel normal. She's not normal."_

" _You used to think she was worse than normal," Elijah said, moving to clean up the tattered remains of one of his journals. He sighed when he saw a name repeated on every line of the page he was holding. He crumpled the page up and threw it across the room._

 _When he was distracted, Rebekah fetched it. She knew who must be immortalized on that page, but...as they say, curiosity killed the cat, but satisfaction brought him back… She held it behind her back, as she continued to try to make him see reason._

" _You're right, I did. But, Elijah, you never did. Are you going to start now?_

" _Yes… I have to. She deserves a life without everything supernatural… without_ us _in it."_

" _Hmm, well, I'm not leaving her behind just because you've decided that. She's my friend, so she's still got the supernatural in her life. A witch, a few vampires, including at least one Original. Tyler's back, too. So… You may think she deserves a life without the supernatural, but as a doppelgänger, she's never going to have that. And this… Thomas is never going to understand or be able to protect her. Didn't you promise to keep her safe?"_

 _Elijah looked up at her then. "No. That is a promise I never made. I don't make promises I can't keep, and with me nearby, she would never be safe. I never promised to protect her, only her loved ones. And now, I guess there is a new person to add to that list."_

" _Elijah," Rebekah sighed._

" _No. Enough, Rebekah. As you can see, I have some tidying to do. Please, leave me, and let me take care of this. I give you my word that I am fine."_

" _I've never known you to give your word in a lie," she said quietly as she did as he asked._

 _Once in her room, she straightened out the page he had discarded. And as she read, a sob caught in her throat. Yes, she knew that her brother cared more than he let on, but… Oh, the pair of them were so stupid! Pathetic, she had called them once, and it was… still true, but in a completely different way now._

"Niklaus told me today that _she_ is getting married. This is all I ever said I wanted for her. She will have the normal life that she deserves. A life, a home, maybe even a family… Everything my family and I took away from her. Everything this life, the one given to her through powers beyond all of us, ripped away from her. But, as much as I know this is what she deserves… I can't be happy for her. I can't be happy knowing that…. she will belong to someone else. I can't even find comfort in the fact that he is not a Salvatore. He is not a vampire. He is normal and human and… How can that be enough?

My lovely Elena… You deserve everything. Everything you want. I cannot believe that you made it out of that town human. I never thought it would happen, but I am so glad that it did. Your humanity and compassion are intact all these years later. But...as much as I want it to be enough, Elena. It's not.

You don't know how I've checked in on you over the years. As far as you're concerned, I left after that business with Alaric… And I never looked back. But… that couldn't be further from the truth.

I watched you graduate from high school. You thought no one came to see you walk across the stage in your cap and gown, with only family friends in Denver, who would have come? But I was there. And I saw the smile you wore as you took your diploma in hand. The one that makes my undead heart stop, Elena. It is the sun, and it almost too bright to gaze at, but I couldn't look away until I saw your face fall when you remembered there was no one to share your joy with.

I saw you when you moved into your first college dorm. You and I were both, I think, immensely glad that you got into NYU. So far from Mystic Falls. So far from where everything was taken from you. I watched you blossom into an even more vibrant version of yourself there. The darkness that always seemed to follow in your wake stayed away while you learned and grew and flourished, lovely Elena.

And every time I saw you, it was harder to make sure you didn't see me. But the shadows of the supernatural weren't blocking your light, Elena, and I couldn't be the one to do that to you. So, I stayed away. And when the occasional threat grew too close, I dispatched it without you ever knowing. Rebekah suspected though, I think.

That's another thing I love about you, Elena. Despite everything that happened between you and her, you were able to connect with Rebekah. I saw you two grow to tolerate each other, like each other, and then, I saw you bring her into your inner circle, Elena. I saw how you made my sister - my wild, brave, fierce sister - feel like she belonged somewhere, and I can never tell you how much that meant to me, Elena. And I will never tell you, as you can never know what I saw.

Then, Elena, I have to tell you something… Niklaus may have been the one to speak it, but I already knew what was coming. As I say, I have looked in on you over the years, and I watched you fall in love. And, lovely Elena… Beautiful, wonderful, compassionate Elena, I saw… I saw him court you in a way that I had secretly wished to. But, Elena, he is… If you are happy, it doesn't matter in the least. But he is no match for your soul. You have more life and passion in your little toe than he has in his entire being. If you are happy, my Elena, then I will endeavor to be happy for you, but I can't see how he can be enough for you.

I wrote you "Always and Forever" in a letter once, and…

 _The page cut off there, but Rebekah knew, if she knew anything about her brother, that his journal continued in this vein for a while. How could two people be so stupid? They were clearly made for each other, much as it used to annoy her. But back then, she hadn't seen that Elena wasn't just another doppelgänger. She was...more. More of everything, and she brought light to everyone she touched. Stefan. Damon. Elijah. Klaus. Even Rebekah herself. Elena was her namesake: Light._

* * *

"Well, I have to go check on the blushing bride," Rebekah said. "Enjoy your absolutely-not-brooding, brother."

She turned on her heel and walked to the back of the church, her plum bridesmaid's dress swishing in a way that made Elijah think of the turning of the last few pages of a favorite book. He turned to watch his sister go. And wished he could follow her. He could see Elena sooner. Could maybe confess like so many had been pushing him to do. But instead, he took another swig from his flask and idly wondered who was going to give her away. Not even Jeremy was left to her. Katerina, devil take her, had made sure of that before disappearing again.

His thought turned back to following Rebekah. As much as he wanted to confess his feelings, he knew that he wouldn't. He was a selfish man, but Elena had never been his to claim. And no matter how much he didn't want to watch her tie her life to another man, he also knew that he wouldn't be the one to ruin her day. He did want her to be happy, even if it felt like he was dying to give that to her.

He'd been here before with other women. But he didn't think it had ever hurt quite this much. And he hadn't even seen her yet.

The day the invitation had come to the compound was still burned into his memory. Despite knowing about Elena and…her suitor from his own observations, Klaus' needling, and Rebekah's concern, the day he received a heavy cream card, it felt…well, it felt like she had daggered him all over again. And just like the first time, it was two-fold. Pain like that of watching her stab herself with grim determination, and then, the blank, shocking realization that his reaction was too slow.

He thought, then, of Hayley walking down the aisle and tying her life to Jackson. That had hurt, but for Hope, and for trying to find peace in the Quarter, he had actually encouraged her to go through with it. If the same opportunity were presented to him now, with Elena, he honestly wasn't sure if he could make the same decision.

Perhaps he would just do what he should've done the day they'd met in Rosemarie's rundown, ramshackle house. Take her with him and never look back.

He lifted the flask to his lips once more, but Klaus reached out to stop him. He turned to glare at his half-brother, who merely shrugged at him.

"I worry about the safety of the other guests, if your impressive control and inhibitions are wiped away before the processional even begins."

"Since when do you care, Niklaus?" Elijah asked, as carefully quiet as his brother. Thankfully, their supernatural hearing allowed this conversation to happen below the exclamations of joy and excitement all around them.

"Since our sister has chosen to make her home here, no matter how we've tried to convince her to stay with us. Since I know that, later, you would hate yourself for any pain you caused Miss Gilbert. Since I don't feel like cleaning up any messes today. Take your pick of my reasons. All that matters is that you not go rabid on the locals."

Elijah glowered at Klaus. "Yes, that's usually your job isn't it?"

"Yes," he said simply.

Just then, everyone who could sit took their available seats. And the organ began to play. To Elijah, it sounded more like a funeral march, but still he turned to look with the rest of the guests.

First, came a young girl Elijah didn't recognize. Since he had long ago familiarized himself with everyone who held a connection with the young woman who had captured his affection, he knew that the girl must be some relation to the man anxiously waiting for his bride-to-be at the top end of the aisle.

He watched as the girl scattered flower petals, and then, he missed much of the rest of the processional as he braced himself for what was to come. Perhaps he shouldn't be here… But it was too late for that thought to cross his mind as he heard the girl – no, woman – who had haunted his thoughts and dreams for years quietly exchange words with whoever was walking her down the aisle. He had come this far, and now Elijah knew he just had to see her in her white dress. It would kill him and give him life in equal measure.


	2. Elena

Elena took a deep breath as she stepped out of her dressing room. She wished more than anything that Jeremy was here to walk her down the aisle. Not to mention, any of the parents she had loved and lost over the years. Miranda, Grayson, Jenna, Alaric, John, even Isobel. None of them were here in person. But it would be a lie to say that she didn't feel their presence with her as she began to walk toward her future, and because of that, she whispered aloud how much she missed them and wished they were there with her, but that she was ready. She pushed back the negative thoughts as she tugged the end of her veil to make sure it was in place.

Her wedding planner waved her forward as the music swelled. And as she slowly made her way down the aisle, she surveyed first the wedding party waiting for her at the far end. Rebekah, Bonnie, and Caroline stood in their varying shades of plum. Rebekah's dress was the darkest, and she looked downright regal beside Elena's other two best friends. Bonnie wore the palest shade, and Caroline's was somewhere in between. Bonnie and Caroline were smiling through their tears, glad that Elena was getting the happy ending that they had all questioned more times than they could count. Who knew she would live to see this?

Across from her friends, Thomas stood, flanked by his best friend, Sam, and two brothers. The four of them were very dashing in their dark grey tuxes. Sam elbowed Thomas when they saw her coming down the aisle, and Thomas' smile grew impossibly wider. Elena couldn't help but smile back, even if he couldn't see it.

But then, she turned her attention to the guests. Thomas had been happy to marry her in Mystic Falls, but she wasn't sure he knew what he was getting into when he agreed to that. It looked like the whole town had turned out. His family had their place, but the rest of the church was packed with the denizens of Mystic Falls. She figured it was a show of support for one of their own who had lost so much in her young life. This was much better than all of the funerals that ruled over her youth.

She saw Matt Donovan and Liz Forbes standing together. Matt gave her a small wave and a bright smile. And both of them chuckled when they saw how completely Liz was failing at hiding her tears. Never an overly affectionate woman, she surprised Elena by blowing her a kiss and mouthing that she was so proud. Elena's smile grew, but it also reminded her again of all the people who should have been there with her. So, she turned to look elsewhere.

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw a flash of silver. When she turned her head to look, she couldn't find the source, but she saw Klaus - it was still surprising to her that she no longer felt a wave of fear when she looked at him. Hell, he'd offered to pay for hers and Thomas' honeymoon.

* * *

" _So, I see that you've managed to tame Rebekah. You'll have to teach me that trick."_

 _The voice came from behind Elena, and she nearly jumped out of her skin when she heard it. It had been many years, and somehow, not quite long enough._

" _Klaus," she said, trying to calm her erratic heartbeat, but she knew he could hear it, and his wolfish grin did nothing to help her relax._

" _Nik, don't give her a heart attack," Rebekah chastised as she waltzed into the room. "We're finally graduating today, and having one of my best friends die would put a serious damper on the day." She turned to look at Elena. "I'm sorry, I should have told you that I invited him to graduation. I meant to… It's just-"_

" _We've been busy, I know," Elena said, stepping away from the man who had had such a devastating effect on her high school years. She wanted to at least keep him in her eyeline if she was going to have to be in the same room as him. "Did you-" She froze, but shook her head and tried again. "Did you, by any chance, forget to tell me if any of your other siblings were coming?" She tried to look nonchalant, but from the sharp look both Rebekah and Klaus shot her, she knew she hadn't been altogether successful._

 _Klaus smirked as Rebekah answered her, "No, Elena, None of the rest are coming. Not even Elijah." A little humor slipped into her tone as she added the secondary thought. "I invited them, but only Nik felt he could fit it into his busy schedule."_

" _Have you been missing us, love?" Klaus asked, but Elena made no sign of hearing him._

 _Elena nodded absently, unsure whether she was relieved or not. But, if Klaus was the only one she had to deal with, that was good, right?_

" _And, I've not been 'tamed,' as you so eloquently put it, Nik," Rebekah scoffed. "Elena and I have simply learned to put our differences behind us. It turns out we have a lot in common when we're not trying to destroy each other at every turn."_

 _Klaus hummed. "So it seems. What of it, love?" he asked, turning to look at Elena. "Willing to let another vicious Original into your good graces? You've got two of us there already."_

 _Elena frowned at him. "Two of you?" Elena asked, but then she just shook her head. "That depends…"_

" _On?"_

" _Are you actually sorry for what you did to me and my friends?"_

" _Was Rebekah?"_

" _Bekah and I have our own arrangement. You are a different matter, and you know it," Elena said as she faced off with Klaus. She knew they could both hear her heart pounding, but this had always worked with Elijah, and she had noticed that Klaus got a kick out of people who didn't simply cower away from him. Besides, Rebekah had proven herself to Elena, and she was sure that nothing would happen to her with her friend at her side._

 _Klaus' smirk grew. "I see that Petrova fire is still burning bright in you. If I say I regret my past actions, we would both know I was lying, love. So, I'll not do that. How about I say that, since Rebekah has deemed you worthy, nothing will happen to you at my hands again?"_

" _And, I should believe you?"_

" _I've not made a move against you since I got here. Even before you realized I was in the room."_

 _Elena hummed as she thought about that. "Fine, but I'm not saying that I trust you."_

" _Well, I never accused you of being stupid. Now, I'm starting to see why Elijah always spoke so highly of you."_

 _Elena flushed, but she turned away to continue getting ready for graduation. "If anything happens to ANYone during today's ceremony…"_

" _It won't. Not at my hand."_

 _Elena nodded, and left the room. During the following summer, Rebekah convinced Elena and the other girls to celebrate finishing their degrees with a New Orleans vacation. And despite knowing he was somewhere in the city, she never saw Elijah. But, Klaus wanted to show off his city, and he was the perfect host. Gradually, Elena came to see him as something other than the vicious hybrid she had thought he was. He, maybe, even became a friend._

* * *

However, it was the person - well, vampire - Klaus was talking to that made her heart stop. His face was turned away, but even now all these years later, she would know that perfect posture and well-tailored suit anywhere.

Elijah.

Klaus obviously heard her heart stutter. He looked over at her and smirked. Elena knew, without looking, that Rebekah would be wearing a similar expression. Despite being a bridesmaid and one of Elena's best friends, Rebekah had spent much of the last six months "subtly" asking Elena if she was sure Thomas was the right man for her. She had thoughts of reunited Elena and a wayward older brother, but Elena staunchly defended her fiancé, knowing that Elijah never even thought of her anymore. She was just another past ally.

But, much as she hated to admit it, there was a small part of her heart that would never belong to the man smiling warmly by their officiant. He looked at her like she was the sun and the stars, and she loved him - she _did_. But…

It didn't matter. Elijah had left her and never looked back. He had nearly kissed her, but then he was gone. And, she had walled off the part of her that belonged to him. Trying to pretend it wasn't there.

* * *

 _Elena jerked awake suddenly. The last thing she remembered was a flash of blonde hair… And then… Oh God. She_ had _to stop driving on Wickery Bridge._

 _Matt! Where was Matt? Was he okay?_

 _She sat up quickly, and her head spun, but she realized where she was. The hospital. Again. Wasn't she just here this morning? After Jeremy found her unconscious, he hadn't been willing to let her stay home. But Dr. Fell had said it wasn't anything serious. Maybe it wasn't that serious this time either. I mean, sure, she'd been in another car accident, but at this point, that was just another Tuesday. She felt fine…_

" _Elena."_

 _Despite the continuing dizziness, Elena whipped her head around to look at Elijah, who was sitting beside her hospital bed. She wasn't sure what surprised her more: that he was there, that he was the_ only _one there, or that he had actually taken off his suit coat and rolled up his sleeves._

 _No, it was definitely that last one, especially when paired with the fact that his hair was a mess. She hadn't seen him this disheveled since she had undaggered him after Damon had tried every trick in the book to get rid of the body._

 _As he watched her, she tried to calm her pounding heart. Despite his face appearing as impassive as ever, there was something in his eyes - relief? Worry? - that made her wonder what had happened while she was out. Not to mention, she wondered how long she had been unconscious…_

" _Elijah," she said, because habit was still habit, even when you'd nearly died. Again. But, she needed at least one answer before she would be able to think about anything else. "Matt?" She couldn't think to form any more to the question. Elijah would know what she meant. Elijah knew the meaning of family._

" _Mister Donovan is fine," Elijah said. He made a move as if to reach out to soothe her, but stopped with his hand held out halfway between them. He hesitated for a moment before drawing it back. "Somehow, you both are fine."_

" _I'm in the hospital?" She meant for it to be a statement, pointing out just how not fine that was, but it refused to pass her lips as anything more than uncertainty._

" _You are. And your friend is in the next room-"_

" _Why separate rooms?"_

 _Elijah watched her, but for the first time in a very long time, she felt he didn't want to answer her question. They were as honest as they could be with each other, but he didn't want to say something now. Instead, he continued with what he had been saying._

" _I am sorry for what Rebekah did. My siblings promised not to directly harm you or your friends. I should have recalled Rebekah's vindictive streak. Though, she did pull Matt from the vehicle, so I suppose she only meant to harm you."_

 _Elena's head was still spinning, so she leaned back again. Worry flickered across Elijah's face, and he didn't hide it nearly quick enough. He moved forward on his seat, like he needed to maintain less distance between them. She closed her eyes and took a breath. "I'm fine. Just…dizzy."_

 _When she reopened her eyes, Elijah was watching her carefully. He glanced at the monitors beside her bed, before nodding to himself and resuming his story._

" _Honestly, she did succeed. You died, but-"_

" _I died! Then, does that mean- What does that mean?" Elena began to hyperventilate, and Elijah finally took her hand. He ran his thumb over the back of her hand in soothing circles._

" _Breathe, Elena. You're still human. Since Rebekah saved Matt- When he saw what state you were in, he performed CPR. You were dead, Elena, but your friend brought you back. But, I wonder why you would wonder, do you have vampire blood in your system?"_

" _At this point, I feel like its always a possibility. Damon and Stefan have gotten…"_

" _Overprotective?"_

" _In their defense, it does seem like I could be killed any day now."_

 _That emotion flickered across Elijah's face again, and Elena watched it with a sense of fascination. There was definitely something he wasn't saying. She looked down and saw that he was still holding her hand. He was looking at their joined hands as well. They both looked up and their gazes met. Before either of them could think, he was perched on the edge of her bed, closer than she could ever remember him being. Well, except for that first day when he came to take her from Rose…_

" _For what it's worth, Elena, I'm glad Mister Donovan was able to save you. The world would be a much darker place without your compassion."_

" _Yeah, I read that somewhere before," she said, smiling faintly as she remembered the letter still pressed between the pages of her journal._

 _She had thought he might kiss her that day. The thought was ridiculous then, but was it still?_

 _Unconsciously, they started to lean in closer. And when their lips were only a hair's breadth apart, a banging sounded from the window to the hallway. Elena turned to look, and Damon and Stefan both stood there. Damon had his hand on the glass, the source of the banging, and a scowl on his face. He was glaring at the Original beside her, but she knew that he would have something to say to her as well. Beside him, Stefan stood, confused but resigned. Elena sighed and turned back to Elijah._

 _While she had been looking away, Elijah had resumed his seat. He was wearing his jacket again, and she knew he was leaving. His face was an impassive mask again._

" _Again, Elena, I am sorry for all that my family has put you through." His tone was practically cold, and Elena had to flinch back, not knowing where this came from. "But, as I promised you, now that we have Klaus back with us, I will keep my siblings from Mystic Falls. At least for your lifetime, and that of your children, unless you ever invite us back. Consider it the least I can do."_

 _He nodded stiffly to her, turned on his heel, and then, he was… Gone. Just gone._

* * *

Just as she processed that he was actually there, his head turned. And their eyes met, and she was thrown back to all of the times they had met when she was younger. The danger, the negotiations, the…meetings the rest of her friends didn't know about. Where the two of them met simply to talk. Where she could talk about writing and literature with someone who appreciated it - and who had often met her favorite authors and could give a different perspective. And he had someone who was interested in what he had done in the time he wasn't plotting against Klaus or, alternatively, Klaus' enemies.

But even as she remembered the times that brought a smile to her face, she also remembered him leaving. And how abrupt it had been. She had almost shrugged it off as post-accident confusion. But she couldn't quite convince herself that the almost-kiss was only a dream. Not least of all because she hadn't thought of him that way until that night. And then, there had been no way to think about it because he was just _gone._

And even as she befriended Rebekah and, to a lesser extent, Klaus, Elijah remained elusive. She must have read more into that lost moment than there was. She turned her attention back to the end of the aisle and her soon-to-be husband.

But then, that same flash of silver. She saw it came from Elijah as he lifted a flask to his lips and took a long swig, his eyes never leaving her. As she continued to watch, he tipped the flask upside down and shake it. Only a couple drops escaped. He frowned, and Klaus rolled his eyes. Elena didn't understand. Elijah didn't turn down a drink when offered, but she never imagined him drinking from a flask. It didn't seem appropriately dignified. Especially at a wedding.

She shook her head. Perhaps he just didn't want to be here. He'd made it clear that whatever pseudo-friendship might have grown out of their ally relationship didn't mean anything to him. He was probably just here at Rebekah's urging.

As she settled on that thought, she took her place opposite Thomas and the ceremony began.

She could feel his eyes on her as the pastor began to speak, and they burned. She quickly glanced back at him, and more than ever before she could read what was passing through his mind. He had always been so careful to shield his thoughts and emotions, but right now, he was laid bare. What had been there the night long ago in the hospital was still there, but it was magnified. Whatever he had been drinking removed whatever he usually sheltered behind, and she wanted to stay focused on that emotion.

She looked back at Thomas. He was looking at her with his usual love and happiness, but it was nothing to what was in Elijah's eyes. And as that thought passed through her mind, everything else came rushing back. The fact that the hospital was not the first time she had seen Elijah's eyes alight like that. It had been there, briefly, the night of his mother's ball. There had been regret the moment he left her with Rebekah in the tunnels. Relief every time she turned out safe and sound despite endless attempts to end her.

Thomas was wonderful, but he didn't ignite a fraction of the love or passion she felt for someone else. Someone she had tried again and again to forget.

There was quiet, and she realized it was her turn to say I do. She knew she should have said it by now, and the whispering that was beginning to pick up only proved that. But she can barely hear the murmurs. She can only see the devotion and desire in deep, brown eyes she never thought she would see again. Nothing else exists.

She ripped her eyes away from Elijah to look back at Thomas. She just has to know… And she looks at the man she is supposed to be marrying. The man she thought she wanted to marry. But now, she realized she was just settling. This isn't right. This is not the person who is supposed to be standing opposite her, but she thought _he_ didn't want her. But his eyes, those beautiful, expressive eyes. The ones she used to pride herself on being able to read when no one else knew what he was thinking… They painted another picture.

And in that instant, she knew they weren't on her anymore. She had felt them burning into her for the entire ceremony, but now, it was like she was cold. She had opened her mouth to say…something. But Elijah's eyes weren't on her anymore, and she needed to know why. So, she looked back, and he was gone. Klaus was still standing in the same place, but he was looking toward the door, and when she followed his look, she saw the door swing shut.

Elijah was gone. Again.

But this time, she knew she could stop it. But first, she had to stop this. Thomas deserved someone who felt about him the way she felt for Elijah. He didn't deserve to be the second choice.

"I'm sorry," she said, knowing that they weren't the words he wanted to hear. Nor were they nearly enough to make up for the hurt she was causing. "I'm so sorry, but I can't…"

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Klaus' head whip around to look at her. And when she looked at Rebekah, standing beside her, she saw a small smile playing on the other woman's lips.

"Go," she mouthed.

"So, so sorry…" Elena said, but then, she was running. Back up the aisle, suddenly very glad she hadn't liked any of the huge, voluminous dresses Caroline had tried to get her into. Even so, she hiked up her skirt so she could run faster. He may be a vampire, but she didn't think he would go too far… She hoped he wouldn't.

She burst out the church door, and paused, looking in both directions, and trying to decide which way to go. Where would he have gone?

She was no closer to making a decision when she heard the door open behind her. She didn't turn, figuring that if it was Thomas or any of his family, they wouldn't want to talk to her anyway. But apparently, that wasn't who had joined her.

"You're never going to find him that way, love," Klaus said.

Elena turned her head to look at the Original hybrid. His face showed none of the malice from when they first met, but then again, that hadn't been there for a while. There was an almost grudging respect between the two these days, and she didn't know which of his siblings she should be thanking for it. She shook off the thought to see that, in fact, Klaus wasn't even looking at her. He had his head tipped back, scenting the air. He found what he was searching for and turned an impish smile on her, eyes twinkling.

"I have a better idea, if you're willing to trust me."

"Not a chance, Klaus," she said, shaking her head. She took a definitive step down the stairs and away from him. As soon as her feet touched the sidewalk, however, she felt herself lifted up into lean, muscular arms.

"Hold tight, love,"

Then, despite her protests, she was practically flying. She wrapped her wrapped her arms around his neck more out of instinct that anything, though she knew that he was more than capable of not dropping her.

Her hair was blown back out of the carefully styled updo. She couldn't remember the last time she'd been brought along at vampire speed, but she definitely didn't remember it being _this_ fast. She felt herself shriek, but wasn't sure the source, exhilaration, fear, or something else.

Just as suddenly as it had started, they came to a stop. She jumped down from Klaus' arms and immediately stumbled. Out of sorts from the sudden changes.

"Klaus! You asshole! What was that?" Elena exclaimed, slapping his chest before she could think her actions through.

He glanced down at where her hand had hit him, and though she knew there was no way she had actually hurt him, she gulped involuntarily. However, instead of threatening her, or even answering her question, he gently gripped her shoulders and turned her around. She found herself frozen, staring.

"Love, you're going to have to do the rest on your own," Klaus said, nudging her forward. "Come now, you've never been properly afraid of any of us. Why start now?"

She heard a whoosh, and she knew that, once more, she was on her own and dealing with Elijah. She could do this. Just another meeting with the noble Original…except not.

They were on weren't too far from the Lockwood Estate, where she and Elijah had spent that long day while he told her about the curse… It was the first time she hadn't been afraid of him. And the first time she had noticed...well, everything:. His dry sense of humor, the graceful way he moved, just…everything that Elijah is. She headed that way, skirt pulled up above her knees, and running as quickly as she could.

As she crossed the lawn between them, she rounded the corner by the pond, and felt her heart stutter. She was surprised when he didn't acknowledge it. It must have been easy for him to hear. But then again, he made no sign of hearing her yell at Klaus. But still… He was there. He was really there. He stood with his back to her, but she could tell he was lost in thoughts. He didn't turn as she approached, and she _knew_ her heart was pounding. Her breathing was labored. She was hardly sneaking up on him, but even when she stood right beside him, he didn't turn his head. So, she stepped in front of him.

His eyes were unfocused, gazing off over the lake. The same one they had once strolled around and around as they planned the end of his brother's life, and built a tenuous trust for the first time. He still held a flask loosely in one hand,, though she knew there wasn't even a drop left. But what really got her was the fact that he was crying. She had never seen him with even the barest hint of tears in his eyes. - not when she betrayed him time and time again, not when she literally stabbed him through the heart, not even when he found out his mother wanted to kill him - never.

But here he was, tears pouring down his face. Though he was still stoic as ever, and it broke her heart.

She stepped closer, unconsciously mimicking his actions from the first time they met. It wasn't until she was inches away that he acknowledged her. His eyes went wide, and he gasped. She tilted her head to the side, now more conscious of the familiarity of her actions, and took taking him in.

"Hello there," she whispered, leaning in to invade his space, as he used to do .

"Elena," he gasped. There was a small smile pulling at the corner of his mouth, but it was overwhelmed by a look of disbelief. His breath was laden with the scent of whiskey, but she knew it would take more than that to get any vampire, particularly the eldest living Original vampire, drunk.

"Elijah."

"What-"

She shook her head and leaned in, close enough for her breath to ghost over his lips. But, unlike all those years ago, in a rundown plantation house, and again in a hospital as she recovered from another near-death experience, it's not an almost-kiss. And there's a moment where he doesn't respond. Elena's about to pull away and apologize for completely misreading everything and regretting her decisions, when his hands come up to frame her face. He holds her like she's something precious, fragile, _desired_.

He was here, and she was an idiot for not realizing sooner. She should know by now to listen to Rebekah. Oh well…

And even as they lost themselves in the long overdue first kiss- odd that it finally came when there was no impending doom in the aire - there was a whoop and girlish laughter from across the lake.

Originals and their complete lack of boundaries…


	3. Deleted Scene

**A/N: Some unexpected bonus content! I decided to share a first draft of the almost kiss between Elena and Elijah. I eventually changed it because there were too many background details that didn't fit my final story, but it was still a good scene… So, anyway - here's a would-be flashback of the time before Elijah left Elena and Mystic Falls behind. Enjoy!**

 _He had come for Klaus' body. At least, that's what he told her when she tried to bar him from entering her house. He'd already been invited in, of course, and they both knew there wasn't really anything she could do to stop him if he truly wanted to enter. But, they had a ritual, and it…pleased them both to stick to it._

" _Elena," he said, meeting her brown eyes, watching her with his usual inscrutable expression, just the barest hint of a smile playing on his lips._

" _Elijah," she greeted. Her heartbeat had picked up as soon as she opened the door and saw him there._

 _It wasn't the first time he had noticed it, but tonight, knowing he had every intention of leaving her behind - for her own safety and well-being, of course - it garnered more of his attention than usual._

 _He heard the conversation in the room behind her come to an abrupt end when she said his name, and soon, the whole of her army of defenders was arrayed behind her. They wore varying expression of distrust and anger at his presence. But, her reaction to_ _his_ _their appearance made him choke back a laugh. Elena rolled her eyes, and it looked as though she were praying for patience._

" _What are you doing here?" Damon spat, taking an aggressive step forward._

" _I have merely come to retrieve my brother's body, or, as you have likely taken it someplace I'm not able to enter freely, information on his location."_

" _Too dang bad," Damon growled. "We're not-"_

" _Forgive me," Elijah said, fighting to keep his composure. "I was under the impression this was the lovely Elena's home. As such, I would prefer to speak to her."_

" _It's my house too," Jeremy said as he warily eyed the eldest living Original._

" _Fair enough, Jeremy Gilbert," Elijah said. "I would talk to you or your sister, but the riff-raff simply must go."_

 _Elena, who had flushed when he described her as lovely, cleared her throat._

" _Jeremy, I've got this." She held up a hand when there were protests. "I'm making this call. Since you all seem to only make things harder. I want all of us to get through this in one piece. Now, out. I know you've got a plan you're not telling me about. Go, work on that, and I'll see if I can get us to tomorrow."_

" _Elena-"_

" _No, Damon. This is my choice. It's my life bound to Alaric's, and since he's been taken from me, I don't want to lose anyone else." She turned back to Elijah. "Care to make a deal? For old times' sake." There was a smile playing on her lips now that her friends couldn't see, and Elijah had to fight harder to contain his own grin._

 _He couldn't understand why her friends doubted her so much. By his calculations, if they listened to her, Alaric would be human, his mother would have been neutralized sooner, and Klaus would not be a hybrid. But alas, they didn't see the wise, compassionate, brilliant young woman Elijah had come to know and respect._

 _They'd been allies for many months now, and Elijah couldn't believe the trust that existed between them - given how many times they had each broken it. But even now, she shooed her brother and their friends from the house before leading him to her room._

 _As he took his usual seat on her window seat, he thought back to their first negotiation. Even then, she impressed him. She had been terrified. He had conned his way into her home, the place she was supposed to be safe. But even as her heart beat a frantic tattoo in her chest, she crossed her arms defiantly and met his gaze head-on. And then, she had pressed for one more thing in their deal, and honestly, he had given her Stefan's return solely because she was bold enough to ask._

 _There was very little he wouldn't give Elena Gilbert. She had only to ask._

 _And that frightened him. Because, as he had told her - lying through his teeth - he had vowed not to fall for another doppelgänger. And yet, here they were. Once again in her bedroom. Once more making a deal with her life in the balance and his maniacal brother at the center. He sat, again, on her window seat as she stood opposite him, evenly matching his gaze._

 _And in that moment, Elijah absolutely knew he needed to get out of Mystic Falls. Because, like an idiot - or worse, a Salvatore - he had gone and fallen in love with this impulsive, warm, intense human girl, and all the light that she was deserved better than to be muted by his, and his family's, darkness._

 _But first, to business._

" _Tell me, Elena, what have you and your friends done with Niklaus' body?"_

" _He's somewhere safe," Elena said. She wasn't lying, but that was easy when she was being intentionally vague._

" _Well, yes, as the originator of your friends' bloodline, I had assumed you wouldn't allow further harm to come to him, despite your personal feelings about him."_

" _So, it's true, Klaus sired Marry?" Elena asked, nodding to herself that they'd gotten that right._

" _Indeed. But, Miss Gilbert, you must know I can better protect him."_

 _She smiled ruefully. "Damon would ask how we know you wouldn't just release your brother from the spell. He's not likely to be forgiving and 'you've betrayed us before for him.'" She said the last part with venom in her voice, but he could tell it wasn't directed at him, but rather at the younger vampire who would have said just that. He quirked an eyebrow at her._

" _Yes, that does sound like Damon. But, you're not asking that?"_

 _She shook her head and moved to sit beside him on the window seat. She left plenty of_ _room_ _space between them, and Elijah found himself wishing the seat weren't quite so long._

 _Elena looked down, idly picking at her nails. "No, I'm not asking."_

 _Elijah turned his body towards hers before reaching out to still her anxious hands. She immediately stilled, and her breath caught, but she didn't move away._

" _Regardless, Elena, I give you my word that, should you restore my brother to me, I will ensure he remains in his current state for the rest of your natural life,_ _I_ _and for the natural lives of your children, should you have them."_

 _Elena looked up and met his earnest gaze. He was drowning in her warm, brown eyes, and without knowing it, he leaned in closer._

 _Her eyes slid closed, and she mirrored his movement, her hands clasping his, where they were still settled in her lap._

 _A hair's breadth from his lips touching hers, the front door slammed._

" _Elena!" the agitated voice of one should-be-dead Damon Salvatore called._

 _Elena flinched, and in the blink of an eye, she was standing in front of him again. Almost as if he had imagined it. There was a faint flush on her cheeks, though, telling him she wasn't unaffected._

" _I take you at your word, Elijah," she said. Then, she scrawled something on a piece of paper and handed it to him. "Go," she mouthed as Damon stomped up the stairs, still calling for her._

 _Elijah glanced down. It was an address. He nodded at her and was out the window just as the doorknob began to turn._

 _He would go. He would collect his siblings. And he would not look back. She deserved happiness. And as long as the Original family was anywhere near her, that was impossible._

 _One last look up at her window, he saw her facing off with an irate Damon. Her back was ramrod straight as she glared at the Salvatore, and Elijah knew he was losing time. He trusted Elena, but her meddling, overbearing friends were another matter entirely._

 _A fleeting thought of the almost-kiss crossed his mind. She hadn't seemed opposed… But no, that way lay madness._


End file.
